Building Healthy Connection in Relationships
The leaves are finally turning. The air is cool and crisp. Halloween is over. For many of us, our focus is turning to the upcoming holidays filled with gatherings and re-establishing connection with friends and families. That thought triggers happy memories and warm feelings for some of us. For others, anxiety, sadness, or dread may be a more accurate feeling.
We are wired for connection
We know that humans are wired for connection. Science has validated this fact and human behavior testifies to it. Scripture speaks to it in the justification for creating Eve. Instinctively, we do the best we can to navigate connection with those that are most important to us. When our sinful nature, circumstances, and/or people create challenges for us in that process, we eventually find ourselves with a lack of connection not only to others, but to ourselves as well.
Unhealthy Patterns
Psychological principles provide us with labels for less than optimal styles of connecting with others that we often adopt. Common ones are: Avoider, Pleaser, Vacillator, Controller, and Victim. These tendencies often reflect our best attempt to navigate the difficult circumstances and relationships that we had at critical times in our lives. These worked to help us feel safe and connected at the time. What we often fail to see is that long term, these tendencies create disconnection instead of the desired connection.
We all have a slot-machine tendency that believes “what worked at one time, will eventually pay out again.” Truth is, we must learn what our unhealthy pattern is, then risk letting go of that so we can put healthier ways to connect into practice. This process is more than a self-help endeavor. Sometimes unhealthy patterns develop in comfortable relationships, and new relationships are where healthy patterns and healing can occur.
How Restoration Counseling of Atlanta Can Help
We at Restoration are not just here to teach or impart new information. Our counselors will walk with you as you learn new patterns of relating to others outside our walls. We know you will eventually become comfortable in your new healthy pattern and will not need us anymore, and we couldn’t think of a better honor. Until then, we’d love to connect with you and begin the journey of equipping you for connection with others that will serve you a lifetime of healthier connections.
Written by:
Debbie Turner, LPC
[trx_image url=”https://restorationcounselingatl.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/deb-300×300.jpg” align=”left” shape=”square” top=”inherit” bottom=”inherit” left=”inherit” right=”inherit”]Debbie Turner received her Master’s in Marriage and Family Therapy from Richmont Graduate University; an academically sound, Christ-centered program. She is passionate about helping individuals and couples learn new ways of connecting with Christ and others to facilitate healing, transformation, and restoration.
debbiet@restorationcounselingatl.com x157
Roswell Location