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Marriage Is Not A Competition
Marriage Is Not A Competition
By Jennifer Stuckert, MA MFT, LPC & Jonathan Stuckert MA, M Phil (candidate)
There are many places in life where competition is welcome, celebrated, encouraged and even helpful. But, marriage is not one of them. When competition becomes one of your key outlooks on marriage you will unknowingly trade it for safety and security. This may not seem like a big deal at first. But, an enduring Godly marriage requires these qualities. Across time a healthy couple bestows these things to one another but, that is not possible if there is a spirit of competition.
When one partner sets themselves against the other, even in jest, the end result is typically scrutiny, uncertainty, and criticism. These are not very positive words. Sometimes this starts from a good place when a couple wants to be playful and tease one another. Then by all means be playful, but encourage one another’s strengths. However, be careful not to one up the other person.