This article is the first in a series on fighting the addictive power of pornography. The series aims to explain the prevalence of internet porn usage, the effects of porn, and how to escape its grasp.
Introduction: A Pharaoh and a Führer
When the ancient Egyptians enslaved the Israelites, Moses came to Pharaoh and said, “Let my people go,” but Pharoah replied, “…why do you take the people away from their work? Get back to your burdens.” Then, Pharaoh commanded his taskmasters to increase the daily work of the Jews, and they enforced the new quota with beatings and verbal abuse.
Similarly, when you say to your porn habit, “Let me go,” the serpentine constriction of addiction tightens, and a hissing voice says, “You must have become idle. You need to get back to work.” And if you refuse, you receive a beating via the discomfort of craving, and your taskmaster rips into you, saying, “What a foolish little servant you are. You thought you’d be happy without me. The truth is, you’re nothing without me. You need me.”
The most tragic part is if you’re trapped in the bondage of porn addiction, you believe the voice of temptation. You think porn is somehow helping you find pleasure or cope with pain, so you keep going back, and back, and back. You don’t yet fully understand that porn diminishes your ability to feel pleasure and increases your pain.
It’s as if porn is a door-to-door flower salesman who arrives at your door with a bouquet. Then, after you accept the offer and pay for the flowers, he secretly walks to your backyard and tramples your garden. Next, he walks back into your house and says, “Your garden is destroyed. It looks like you need more flowers.” Confused but strangely grateful, you buy more flowers, but they have no roots, so they die quickly. You invite the salesman back repeatedly, fearful of planting and tending another garden. You never realize the proper solution is to replant your garden and ban the con artist from your property. That is the cycle of addiction, but addicts are blind to it. Truthfully, every addict believes their addiction serves them, but it’s the other way around. It’s the worst kind of slavery–the kind you don’t know you’re in until it feels too late.
But it’s not too late–not if you’re willing to face your enemy and let God fight for you. You can win the war against porn, and you’ll be happy you did. On the other side of addiction is a green pasture and still waters, and your Shepherd is waiting patiently to lead you there.
Now, to describe the journey that lies ahead, let me supplement the metaphor of ancient Egyptian slavery with that of Nazi Germany and the Axis Powers. Adolf Hitler, like Pharaoh, is a ruthless character, perfectly content to use and abuse human souls. However, Hitler is unlike Pharaoh–and probably more evil–in that he unleashed genocide and sought to expand his oppressive power across the globe. It is no exaggeration to say that Hitler embodied evil like few other historical figures and posed an existential threat to the Western world as we know it.
Likewise, internet porn is happy to use and abuse you, but it will never be content until it puts you into forced labor, but it would prefer to kill you spiritually. If porn has entered your life, it has already declared war against you, and only one of you will see victory. Unfortunately, if you offered terms of peace, your offer would be met with laughter or a strategic pretense of acceptance. The offer of peace is not on the negotiating table. Rather, you only have the following three options: 1) passively allow porn to conquer you, 2) fight halfheartedly and be exhausted by a lifelong battle, or 3) call on God and fight wholeheartedly and win the war.
Notice the third option requires both God’s power and your responsibility. And yes, even your willingness to fight is a gift of God’s grace, but you must walk in it. This dual reality (the need for God’s power and your responsibility) is why I have used the metaphor of a Pharaoh and a Führer. To defeat Pharaoh, you need God’s miraculous deliverance–ten plagues and a parting of the Red Sea. To defeat Hitler, you also need divine intervention, but God’s intervention must come through a deep understanding of the enemy, a multidimensional war strategy, a never-give-up mindset, and the moral character to rise to the occasion. Finding deliverance and winning the war against porn will require the same.
And if you don’t think that addiction to porn is a large enough problem to extinguish your spiritual life, consider that Germany is a small country, but through alliances, Hitler formed a military coalition with Italy and Japan. Together, they became the Axis Powers, and it wasn’t entirely clear that the West could defeat them. Likewise, if you think a small porn habit is going to lie dormant, consider that it will be making back-room deals with its favorite allies, like shame, isolation, and spiritual apathy.
If you’re sick and tired of being sick and tired, if you’re scared but willing, if you’re at the end of yourself and desperate for a way out, keep reading. My prayer over this article is that it will inspire you, comfort you, and give you a way of escape.
On the other hand, if you’re hesitant to call on God and fight wholeheartedly against porn, at least muster the honesty to admit you probably won’t see victory. However, if you are ambivalent about change, keep reading, because I hope to change your mind. So, try to read with an open mind. Consider this your invitation to a life of freedom.
An Exhortation from Winston Churchill
Where should we turn next but to Winston Churchill, the man many consider the most critical leader during World War II? He had sounded the alarm about the Nazis before the war, but when the war officially broke out in 1939, it became clear to everyone that the intentions of the Nazis were every bit as evil as Churchill claimed. In response, Great Britain realized Churchill was the man for the hour, so they elected him to the office of prime minister in 1940. In his first speech as prime minister, titled “Blood, Toil, Tears, and Sweat,” he rallied the Western world for the war ahead.
As you read the following excerpt from his speech, imagine he is speaking to us about the invasion of porn into our lives. Imagine he is talking to you about your battle, awakening your desire to wage war valiantly and tactfully. Let his words inform you about what to expect on the journey ahead and how to survive it.
“We have before us an ordeal of the most grievous kind. We have before us many, many long months of struggle and of suffering. You ask, what is our policy? I can say: It is to wage war, by sea, land and air, with all our might and with all the strength that God can give us; to wage war against a monstrous tyranny, never surpassed in the dark, lamentable catalogue of human crime. That is our policy. You ask, what is our aim? I can answer in one word: It is victory, victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror, victory, however long and hard the road may be; for without victory, there is no survival…But I take up my task with buoyancy and hope. I feel sure that our cause will not be suffered to fail among men. At this time I feel entitled to claim the aid of all, and I say, “Come then, let us go forward together with our united strength.” [1]
Jon Hunt enjoys working with teens, adults, and couples on issues including ADHD, anger, anxiety, panic attacks, and phobias, depression and suicidality, grief and trauma, insomnia, marital and premarital needs, pornography and behavioral addictions, and substance addictions. Jon uses insights from evidence-based therapeutic approaches but always stays grounded in the truth of God’s word.